Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Second Birthday tickers

Shut off notices everywhere, eviction notice, no car insurance, no working phone, a negative bank account balance, rummaging through house for change and selling stuff for diapers and going to church food pantries, etc=ONE BIG NEVER ENDING NIGHTMARE.

Have you ever had a dream that seemed so real that it was like you could actually feel the physical and emotional pain? And when you wake up you have to take a moment to realize it wasn’t real?

Now I have another painful cyst and strep throat. lol life. lol

Apparently the first “purge” crime in Louisville was a guy stealing a beer and a pickle. It must have been a pretty darn good pickle! The crispiest and crunchiest pickle of all pickles. ;) haha

Listening to the police scanner. They have had some home invasions and cars set on fire in Louisville already…wow…I didn’t think it would actually happen…

I live 20 miles from Louisville Kentucky. And this whole “The Purge” threat tonight at 8-6 is most likely a hoax, but you just never know. And if anyone found out whom these people were, they would probably go after them and give them a taste of their own medicine. They made a huge mistake even joking about it. An empty threat can turn into a bigger problem. Seriously, some humans only use 1% of their brains…if that. Be safe tonight everyone!

So I had a really bad ear infection last week and couldn’t hear, and then my ear drum burst in the shower the other day. There was all this blood and liquid. And then yesterday I was wrestling with Anna because she was throwing a fit and I suddenly hear a pop in my neck. Woke up this morning and my neck and throat was so swollen that it looked like I gained 20 lbs. But on the bright side, got the house clean and am caught up on school. lol

Sitting here at 10:06 pm desperately trying to finish school work. Excel spread sheets, essays, quiz, class discussions, and a bunch of other crap. Blehh.

Annabelle does this thing now where she blows on her food before she eats it. I guess she saw me doing it once. lol And she likes to walk backwards and hysterically laugh. She is a ham. lol

I’m so frustrated. I have been trying so hard to keep my mom happy because she is going through menopause and is having financial problems. I offered to sell a bunch of my stuff and give her the money. And I cleaned the house really well yesterday and have been trying to have dinner ready for her everyday when she gets home. I used a portion of the little school stipend I got to get her a cheap couch because she had to get rid of the expensive sectional. That’s all I could do cuz I have bills to pay and diapers and food to get. I even offered to babysit for her guy friend and give her the money I make. And all she says is, “it’s not enough”. She was so ungrateful about it. I don’t expect any praise, but I also don’t think I deserve mean hateful words either. I know my mom has worked really hard all her life and has always struggled. But dang. It really hurt my feelings that anything at all I do for her doesn’t please her. I have always tried to show my appreciation for everything she has done for me in my life. And no I am not perfect and make mistakes and sometimes come off as stuck up because I am shy and stressed like all the time. But I try really hard to make a good impression and be as nice and positive as possible to people. That’s how my mother taught me to be. And now she doesn’t following her own teachings. I also suspect she is going through a mild form of dementia because she has been so forgetful lately and her moods go up and down constantly. She just isn’t herself, and it worries me. :/

Sometimes I feel embarrassed being poor. I know other people have it worse. But we might get evicted, have to go to the food pantry this week, desperately selling used baby stuff online, etc. When is it my turn for things to get better?